Playground for Parents

We Scored. Now What?

I had frozen yogurt with hot fudge for lunch.  This was followed in the evening by TWO glazed donuts that my mom brought when she came over to watch the baby.  One glazed was a twist and the other was just round - had to make sure they actually taste the same.  There's no denying that my sweet tooth is freakishly huge.  But, that wasn't always the case.  When I was little, I would still have my Halloween candy months later, even when Easter rolled around.  Well, apparently, my daughter has inherited my now adult sweet tooth, and she'd eat candy everyday if she could. Like every good parent, I don't want my kid to follow in my corrupt footsteps.  Kinda like that "do as I say not as I do" thing. 

 

So, after she's done her trick-or-treating on Halloween, I choose some random number as the amount of candy she's allowed to keep. Sometimes, I've allowed a negotiation with the amount. As brilliant as she is, she doesn't quite get the concept of negotiation - I say 10 pieces, and she responds with, " how about 7?"  Uh, OK. Normally you want to go in the other direction, but whatever, I can work with 7 pieces of candy.  She picks her favorite pieces, and I eat the rest we give the rest to Daddy to take to work (after I've selected a few of MY favorites. I sure wish folks would give out a lot more M&M's and KitKats, and a lot fewer Tootsie Rolls and SweetTarts).  After a few days, she forgets about the remaining candy that she's chosen, and I secretly toss it. There's no sugar-overdose, and everybody is happy.  

 

This year, the baby will get her own bag to collect candy in.  She looks hilariously adorable in her turkey costume - the fact that she already waddles when she walks just perfects the whole turkey look. No one will be able to resist her.  And I'll give you one guess as to who will benefit from her candy loot.

 

Wishing you all a safe and fun-filled Halloween.  And more M&M's.  The plain ones, of course.

 

Letting Go...a Little

Over the weekend, I agreed to let my eight year old go to a carnival with her best friend's family.  At night.  As the event approached, it suddenly dawned on me that I have never done this before - released my kid into the care of another, at a crowded event. At night. And no, school field trips don't count.  I'm referring to the bustling amusement parks, concerts, festivals...and carnivals.  At night.

 

So, to ensure that she would be seen and kept track of in a crowd (and basically to make myself feel better), I tried to prepare her well: Bright orange shirt (if she wore blue or white or pink, she'd just blend into the crowd). Orange jacket (in case the shirt was covered up). Sparkly silver hat (in case all they could see was the top of her head). Mini flashlight attached to her belt loop (in case...I don't know...she needed to lead a darkened path?). Safety tattoo placed strategically on our arm, with our phone number (in case she got lost and was too traumatized to remember our phone number. Nevermind that she's known our phone number since preschool). And Daddy rehearsed the safety rules with her...after I did.  

 

The only thing missing was supplying her with a can of mace or a gun. Thought that might be overkill.

 

Can you imagine how it will be when she's allowed to date at 16  18   21?

 

Giveaway! Kids Clothing from happygreenbee!

 
I told you I was bringing you something happy, and I promise that this won't disappoint. "Happy" is even a part of their name, so you know it's gotta bring some joy!  The latest great giveaway item on the Playground is soft, thick, bright and fun, and simply adorable.  We're planning to get some great use out of it this winter, and look fashionable while we're at it!

 

Introducing:  happygreenbee. Doesn't the name just conjure up images of fun and frolic, smiles and giggles?  This latest website find is a treasure of organic cotton kids and baby clothing, in bright colors and fun patterns.  Their philosophy is evident in their product:   happygreenbee has a simple philosophy: clothing that is comfortable, colorful, playful and ecologically responsible. "We created Happy Green Bee so that a child can be a child, first and foremost," Quimby explains. "By using organic cotton, a comfortable and practical fabric, and simple bee-striped patterns, children feel as comfortable as they look while their parents take a small step in making a big difference in the environment their children live in."

 

happygreenbee sent Munchkin a Reversible Hoodie in "watermelon" to review (top photo).  The quality is wonderful and the sizing is generous. Worn over her flare jeans, she's the hippest kid in daycare.  Best of all, I just love that it's organic cotton touching my little one's skin.

 

The history behind the company is a fascinating one. Makes me want to pack a duffle bag and hike the Himalayas.  While your cruising their great clothing selection on their website, be sure to check out the History link, and find out the buzz about happygreenbee's beginnings, including the affiliation with the mega-company you've all heard of, Burt's Bees!

 

And here's the news you've been waiting for in this post:  happygreenbee has generously offered to giveaway a stylish hoodie to one of my super-fab readers!  Your choice of color!  Here's more about this fantastic item:  "Our 100% organic cotton reversible hoodie is an “easy on-easy off” pullover classic, suitable for the most squirmy little sport! No buttons, zippers, or drawstrings….just two layers of ultra soft interlock, organic cotton fully fashioned for an easy fit. A great cover up over a bathing suit or mix and match with your jeans or our solid leggings for a fashion forward look. Don’t let a grape juice spill spoil the day! Just reverse the hoodie from the inside out and you’re good to go!!"

Wanna Buy It?  Go to www.happygreenbee.com.  Check out the fun and fabulous selection of organic clothing in various styles and colors.

 

Wanna Win It?  Of COURSE you do! One lucky reader will win their very own hoodie of choice!

 

Visit www.happygreenbee.com.  Leave a Comment telling me your favorite item, or something you discovered from their History link!  Comments must be received by 11:59pm (PST) on November 6th.  One winner will be selected by Random.org. Winner will be notified via email, and will be announced here.  Be sure to leave your email address so that I can contact you (and make sure it doesn't go to spam) - I'd hate for you to miss your prize. Winner has 48 hours to respond, or a new winner will be selected. Open to residents of U.S. and Canada Good luck!

 

 Increase your chances to win!  For more entries, you can: 

1. Subscribe to my blog (located on the top, right side of this page).  After you've subscribed, leave three separate Comments for three entries! Are you already a Subscriber?  Just leave three Comments and say, "I subscribe!"
2. Blog about this Giveaway and link back to Playground for Parents.  Leave five separate Comments with the link to your post, for five entries!
3. Post my blog button on your site!  Leave five separate Comments with your blog link, for five entries!! 
4. Email a friend about this Giveaway and cc me: PlaygroundMail@aol.com. Leave a Comment for your one extra entry!
5. If you have Entrecard, drop your card on me, or advertise on my site! Just leave me a Comment and let me know you've done so.
6. Follow me on Twitter  AND tweet about the Giveaway! You can do this DAILY, for an entry each day! Just leave the link to your tweet in your comment each day!
7. Leave a comment on any NONgiveaway post on my blog, and come back here and let me know you did!

* Be sure to leave a Separate Comment for EACH entry. That's EIGHT total ways to enter this fantastic contest! 

Many thanks to Mari for providing this giveaway and review!

 

CONGRATULATIONS TO LUCKY WINNER, REBECCA (#164)!

 

Things I Will Never Understand, Part II

I thought twice about publishing this post. I didn't want to be a "Debbie Downer."  Afterall, my last post was about the death of my daughter's coach.  That's enough drama and trauma for the week.

 

And then life reminded me that we don't get to control many of the things that happen to us; that good news and bad news will continue to unfold with each passing day, whether you're ready for it or not. Yep, that's what I was reminded of when I received an email from a friend last night.  And I felt compelled to share it with you, my other mama friends and readers.  Because in it lies not only a safety lesson, but a reminder about what's truly important.  I promise that the next post will be something bright and cheery, maybe a giveaway.  But in the meantime, that email has wrapped itself heavily around my heart, and I thought about it off and on all day today.  I'm sure it was much worse for my friend.

 

We've all done it, including me. Lay the baby on our bed to sleep, because it's cooler, quieter, or just more convenient.  Or we're at a friend's house and that's the only place to put him down for a nap.  And there's no way we're going to let him skip that nap.  We place some pillows around him so he won't roll off.  We check on him periodically. We're aware of the risks of doing so, pushed to the back of our mind.  But, we move on to worry about other safety concerns, like reactions to vaccines, or new daycares, or the stupid swine flu.  We've all done it, and we were lucky.  My friend's co-worker was not.

 

Like I said, I received an email from this friend last night.  She had titled it, "Terrible, terrible day."  That's an understatement.  She told a group of us moms about the experience she personally just had with a co-worker, whose baby had been put down on a bed for a nap.  With her permission, I've posted her story below.  If you're moved to comment on this post, feel free to also comment directly to my friend, Stacy, who witnessed the mother's trauma.  She's a loyal reader, and she'll see it. As much as I won't even let myself imagine being the co-worker that this happened to, I also can't imagine being in Stacy's shoes, the person standing next to her while the drama unfolds. 

 

And when you're done,  give your baby an extra kiss and hug today, so thankful for that moment.  

 

This morning, shortly after I arrived at work, I chit chatted with a few co-workers and settled in to my work.  Just before 10 a.m., I could hear my co-worker on the phone in her office.  I initially thought that she was having a fun and lively conversation with someone, until I heard her say "Just tell me what happened to my baby".  I went in to her office to find out if everything was okay and I could see that she was shaken up.  She received a call from someone (I'm not sure if it was her grandmother or her neighbor) informing her that something had happened to the baby and that she needed to come home right away.  They wouldn't tell her what happened but they said they would come to pick her up.  I volunteered to drive her home instead.  She was in no condition to drive.

 

As we drove, she tried again to find out what happened to her son, but was only told that he was taken away in an ambulance and that we should go directly to the hospital. As we are driving from Century City to Sun Valley, I'm rolling through stop signs in Beverly Hills and tailgating people on the Canyon, trying to get her to her baby.  She called the hospital and they wouldn't tell her anything, they just asked how long it would take her to get there.    She called home one more time and realized that her mom and grandmother were both still at the house, so who went to the hospital with the baby?  Oh, and there are police officers at the house.  The whole time, I'm trying to reassure her that everything is going to be alright, and I believe that it will.

 

When we arrive to the hospital, I drop her off outside of the ER, where her neighbors are waiting to take her in.  I asked her if she wanted me to stay and she said yes.  I found a parking space right away and by the time I got into the ER, she was in a room that I couldn't go in.  I couldn't go in the room, but I could hear her and I knew what happened.  The anguish in her voice was clear.  Her baby was gone.  She was (understandably) hysterical.  Her five month old son, her only child had died.  Her neighbor stepped out and explained to me what happened:  Her mom keeps the baby everyday.  This morning, she went into the room where the baby was sleeping on the bed and couldn't find the baby.  She panicked and thought that the baby had been taken.  The screams from her and the grandmother brought the neighbors over and they searched for the baby.  At some point the paramedics were called, when they arrived, they found the baby under the bed.  Apparently the baby must have rolled and slipped down between the bed and the wall.  He suffocated.  The neighbor said that they had been looking for the baby for about 20 minutes and he was already blue when they found him.  Though the paramedics tried CPR and took him the hospital (where they also tried to resucitate), the doctor later informed her that he was probably gone long before he reached the hospital. 

 

I was eventually able to get into the room with her, and just sit with her and hold her and listen to her.  Only her neighbors were at the hospital because the mother and grandmother had to stay at the "crime scene" and be questioned by the police.  She wanted to see her baby, but because she was so emotional, they wanted to wait for a family member to arrive.  We convinced her to calm down so that she could see her baby and she did.  We entered the room where her baby lay.  In the room was a priest and a police officer and the body of her lifeless, five month old son.  If he didn't have the tube in his mouth, I would have thought he was just sleeping.  In fact, I was hoping with all of my might that it was just a mistake and that he was sleeping...but he wasn't. 

 

How do you comfort a mother that has just lost her only child???  He was only five months old.  We were in the office yesterday talking about what his Halloween costume was going to be.  This is unimaginable, but of course I'm thinking as I'm standing there, what if that were me?  What if my child's lifeless body were laying on that table?  How can you not think that?  He was five months old!!!  It's not fair!  Not only has she lost her child, but her mother was responsible for him at the time.  How is that going to affect their relationship?  In the car on the way, when she only had part of the story, she was asking why her mom didn't have the baby in the playpen?  When she was at the hospital, she apologized to her baby for not being there.  It was so heartbreaking and emotionally draining for me, so I cannot even begin to imagine her pain. 

 

So, I stayed with her for a couple of hours, until the baby's father and grandparents (from the father's side) arrived.  I left with such a heavy heart and am still feeling pain for her loss.  It's just not fair. 

 

 

 

Here's a great resource that another friend recommended, should you or someone you know need it:  http://www.blogher.com/how-be-there-when-someones-child-dies-part-i-first-days

 

 

Things I Will Never Understand

My daughter's coach is dead.  He was only 35 years old.  Thirty-five.  I hadn't even "found myself" yet at 35.  And it wasn't a quick and painless death.  It was brain cancer.  A nasty, evil disease that in the end left him paralyzed, immobile, and unable to speak for the final few weeks of his life.  Can you imagine being a kid and seeing your dad in that condition?  Or being a wife and witnessing your vibrant husband decline?  His brain cancer had been in remission, which is why we had the opportunity to meet him last spring during track season.  That was just...five months ago.  He looked fine.  He was upbeat, had a warm smile, a genuinely nice guy. Best of all, he was great with those little kids.  Had more patience than I could ever have.  We didn't know what he knew - that he had brain cancer and it could come back any minute and take him away from his three young children. And a wife.  Well, the cancer chose to come back just a month ago. A month. You know how quick a month is. Just a month ago, we were preparing our kids for the new school year. Coach Lamon was fighting for his life, and possibly preparing his kids for his death.  I didn't know him well. But, this I know - that 35 is too young to die. Leaving three young children.  And a wife. 

 

As I was reflecting on the news of his passing, the memory of another parent came flooding back.  She was the mom of one of my daughter's soccer teammates last year.  It was the first season of soccer for both of our daughters.  We were lucky if they kicked the ball without falling over.  The mom was bubbly.  I still remember her tickling her little boy in the grass to keep him distracted while her daughter practiced.  Her daughter had autism, and the mom showed a lot of patience.  She was separated from her husband, so she was doing a lot of this parenting thing on her own.  During one of the Saturday games, she congratulated me on our new baby, and we talked about the delivery experience. I remember that she was easy to talk to, really nice. By the following Saturday, that mom had died in a car accident. Poof. Two little kids who REALLY needed their affectionate and nurturing mom, was gone.  I can't remember her face now. But, this I know - that she was too young to die. Leaving two young children.

 

And now I realize that the more people that we meet and let into our lives, the more tragedy and death we are going to be exposed to. But, we don't have a choice, do we? There's no way around it, except maybe to isolate ourselves, build a bubble around us. That's not an option.  Yet, I can't help but focus right now on the unfairness of it all. Why "good people" have to go.  Why 35 year old fathers who contribute to other kids' lives, or young soccer moms...or my 28 year old little brother...why they don't make it as long as I have.  And perverted, malicious, violent "people" - like the kind who kidnap little girls and keep them in their backyard for 18 years and do despicable things to them on a daily basis - why those people get to live until they're 80. I think we've all asked that question.  Thank God my daughter hasn't asked it of me, because I surely don't have the answer.

 

My heart is heavy. I know this will pass. Another sports season is upon us. Another year of meeting new people, and making new friends. I can only pray that they all remain safe, for the sake of their children that need them.

 

RIP Coach Lamon.

Where the Wild Things Are

It's coming on Friday.  And nothing will stand in my way.  Not work.  Not household chores.  Not an invitation from my girlfriend to go to the foot spa.  Oh yea, you KNOW it must be good.  Oh, please be good.  Please be as good as the trailers make it seem - magical and mystical and beautiful.  Because I'm more excited about the release of this new kid's film than my kid.  I'm more excited than YOUR kid.  And nothing will stand in my way.  Not even my daughter's less than enthusiastic reaction.

 

When I told my 8 year old, with a big stupid grin on my face, that Where the Wild Things Are comes out this Friday, she responded, "I'm not that excited, mom."  Wellll...it's kinda bordering on pathetic when you force your child to attend the latest kid's flick and they didn't even ask. But, truly, how is it any different from every other wise decision we must make as parents, because they just don't know any better?  And then she can thank me later, for being the all-knowing, all-powerful Oz.

 

One of my favorite kid-review sites had this to say so far, with more details coming on the movie's opening day, October 16th: 

(From www.commonsensemedia.org) Parents need to know that director Spike Jonze's highly anticipated adaptation of the Where the Wild Things Are book by beloved children's author Maurice Sendak is likely to appeal to any kid (or adult) who loves the fantastical tale of intrepid Max. But based on the movie trailer, the PG rating, and Jonze's edgy reputation, parents should expect the film (which promises to have mild language, peril, and dark themes) to be a better fit for older kids. This isn't aimed at the kindergarten set -- no matter how well versed they may be in Max's journey.  Come back for a full review by Sandie Angulo Chen on October 16, 2009.

We'll see you in the theater line.  We'll be the ones trying to sneak in a bag of microwaved popcorn and some juice boxes, just to save a buck.

Birthday Bash Winners!

I had a blast hosting the Birthday Bash, and I hope you had fun too!  You gals suggested great birthday planning tips, and shared some pretty, um, entertaining memories of parties past.  Your next party is now going to be an easy piece of cake, right?!  Right.  OK, so I'm no fool - I know the giveaway bash is MOST fun for the actual winners of the giveaways. And HERE THEY ARE...

$50 Gift Certicate from BirthdayExpress.com:  #176, Tracy!

Personalized Confetti from Pink Poodle Boutique:  #83, Tori!

$25 Gift Certificate from Beau-Coup:  #411, Kathy!

$30 Gift Certificate from Karen's Cookies:  #29, Gloria!

Giant Fortune Cookie from Lady Fortunes:  #36, Naddez!

Zhu Zhu Pet:  #5, Crystal!

CONGRATULATIONS, you party animals!  All winners have been notified via direct email.  Please be sure to respond to the email within 48 hours, or a new winner will be selected (which is what everyone who didn't win is hoping for!).

The Negligent Tooth Fairy

My eight year old still believes in the Tooth Fairy.  Adorable, right?  Well, evidently, she also believes that the tooth fairy will come digging around under pillows even when you do NOT have a tooth under there. Evidently, the tooth fairy in my daughter's world is expected to respond to letters about loose teeth, or almost loose teeth, or teeth that may be lost sometime in the future. Letters that I don't even know are under the pillow in the first place. 

 

Letters like the one she showed me this morning, because the inept tooth fairy didn't respond to it when my kid put it under her pillow last night:  "Dear Tooth Fairy: When is this tooth coming out? It's painful and it's wiggling. Are you coming to get it soon?"

 

OK, nevermind that my kid's tooth is not even loose, but she swears it is and forces me to look at it every evening. Now, given that I am the intermediary for the tooth fairy, you tell me -how is the tooth fairy supposed to receive my daughter's highly important letters about loose teeth, if I don't even know that she wrote the letter?!? Am I supposed to start checking under her pillow each night JUST IN CASE my kid wants to have a conversation with the tooth fairy about floss?

 

I've responded to letters to the toothy fairy in the past, like when my daughter asked the tooth fairy a couple of years ago if she had a leprechaun for a brother, and if she knew the Easter Bunny personally. Oh, you laugh. But, you should've seen how hard it was to write that tiny, as if it the response had come from fairy hands. And at least that letter accompanied an actual tooth. 

 

Now what's next?  Cookies and milk left out for Santa before Christmas? Actually, that wouldn't be so bad. Surely, I would notice those.

 

 

Giveaway! Clothing from I Am A Girl Designs!

Say it LOUD, "I'm a girl and I'm PROUD!"  My daughter is a mini scholar, and I burst with pride at her many academic accomplishments. She is also a budding athlete, and I burst with fits of screaming, yelling, and other embarrassing antics at her sporting competitions. When she's wearing her team uniform, she's representing her love, hard work, and commitment to her sport. And when she's wearing a cool shirt from "I am a Girl" Designs, she's showing the love too.

 

Introducing:  "I am a Girl" Designs.  Sweatshirts, t-shirts and tanks just for the little ladies, who temporarily toss aside their favorite stuffed animal to ROCK IT at their favorite sport. The clothing is fun and inspiring, with an adorable stick figure graphic engaged in everything from soccer, cheer, basketball, and more. 

 

A bit about their powerful business motto:   “I am a Girl” Designs  wants to encourage all "Girls" to celebrate what they love.  "I am a Girl" Designs is dedicated to helping develop strong, smart, spectacular young "Girls" with unshakable confidence. An "I am a Girl" can define her character by celebrating her passions and at "I am a Girl" Designs one can show their passion for Soccer, Softball, Dance, Swimming or other sports & hobbies they love by sporting “I am a Girl” apparel.  My passion for design helped me bring “I am a Girl” Designs to life and it’s my dream that through my adventure with this company that other girls will be inspired to show their passion and be empowered to:  "Take that Passion and make it  Happen".

 

"I am a Girl" Designs sent my daughter their "I am a running girl" sweatshirt to review. Love it! The sweatshirt is thick, comfy, roomy, and high quality. Of course, most important to my daughter, it looks cool too. She can't wait until it gets cold enough to show it off on the track this coming season.

 

Take my word for it that the photos on the website don't really reflect how cute these shirts are. Don't have a girl? I'm betting that you know one, and I'm betting you hear from her parents about every goal she has scored. Great as a gift, or a reward for the sporting season. Think I can get them to create one that says "I am a hot mom?"

 

Wanna Buy It?  Go to "I am a Girl" Designs Check out the wonderful selection of sports and hobby themed shirts, in various styles and colors. And just for you, my beloved readers, get 20% off your purchase by using the following inser code, until 10/20/09: http://www.iamagirldesigns.com/?code=PFP

 

Wanna Win It?  Of COURSE you do! One lucky reader will win their very own shirt of choice!

 

 

Visit www.iamagirldesigns.com.  Leave a Comment telling me your favorite item. Comments must be received by 11:59pm (PST) on October 14th.  One winner will be selected by Random.org. Winner will be notified via email, and will be announced here.  Be sure to leave your email address so that I can contact you (and make sure it doesn't go to spam) - I'd hate for you to miss your prize. Winner has 48 hours to respond, or a new winner will be selected. Open to residents of U.S. and Canada Good luck!

 

 Increase your chances to win!  For more entries, you can: 

1. Subscribe to my blog (located on the top, right side of this page).  After you've subscribed, leave three separate Comments for three entries! Are you already a Subscriber?  Just leave three Comments and say, "I subscribe!"
2. Blog about this Giveaway and link back to Playground for Parents.  Leave five separate Comments with the link to your post, for five entries!
3. Post my blog button on your site!  Leave five separate Comments with your blog link, for five entries!! 
4. Email a friend about this Giveaway and cc me: PlaygroundMail@aol.com. Leave a Comment for your one extra entry!
5. If you have Entrecard, drop your card on me, or advertise on my site! Just leave me a Comment and let me know you've done so.
6. Follow me on Twitter  AND tweet about the Giveaway! You can do this DAILY, for an entry each day! Just leave the link to your tweet in your comment each day!
7. Leave a comment on any NONgiveaway post on my blog, and come back here and let me know you did!

* Be sure to leave a Separate Comment for EACH entry. That's EIGHT total ways to enter this fantastic contest! 

 

Reminder:  Check the top corner of this page for other fantastic Giveaways! Hurry, they end soon!

Many thanks to Dori for providing this giveaway and review!

 

CONGRATULATIONS TO LUCKY WINNER, CRYSTAL (#83)!