She Doesn't Even Know You

The crying starts before I even let her go. As I walk away, they get louder, at least in my heart. I close the door, but can still hear the crying. I can't walk out of the building and around the corner fast enough. The guilt, and her cries follow me to my car. And I send up a prayer that it stops in a minute, like everyone assures me it will.

 

That's how I get to begin every morning when I drop Munchkin at daycare. And it sucks. Hugely. When we had the nanny, Munchkin would reach out for her and go into the nanny's arms, smile and wave bye-bye. But, at daycare, the caregivers are still unfamiliar and there are several of them. There are also other babies. Babies who cry when their parents leave, or for some other unknown reason. Munchkin cries when they cry. I try to distract her when this happens, but I see her senses perk up, as she prepares to join in the wail-fest. I comfort myself knowing that the morning transition is a brief one, and I'll be told when I pick her up that she had her usual good day of smiling, blowing kisses, and playing with her new friends.

 

Except when I picked up Munchkin yesterday, I was told that it had been a bit rough, that she cried on and off everytime someone left the room. Mind you, she didn't even know the people coming and going. But, apparently she doesn't want anyone to leave once they come in. Like separation anxiety with complete strangers! It's as if she's saying, "if this place is so great, then why aren't you staying here?"  They said they tried to distract her when someone left, but she'd simply look around for them and cry once she realized they had escaped.

 

So, now on top of the morning crying, and the transmission of cooties that have had Munchkin sick and out of daycare for more days than she's attended, I have to be concerned about her separation anxiety with strangers. All I have to go on is that all of this is supposed to be temporary - soon she'll get used to being left at daycare, soon she'll get immune to the germs...

 

Sigh. I'm rethinking this whole nanny versus daycare thing.

 

 

Comments

[Stacy]

As a proud parent of a "daycare baby" let me add my reassurance to everyone elses. She'll be fine. Those germs are actually good for her because they are helping her build up her immune system. They crying is absolutely a phase. Can you imagine her crying when you leave her everyday for the rest of her toddler life?? Of course not. It's not gonna happen. What will happen is that she will one day almost jump out of your arms to get into that place. I'd bet on it. In the meantime...wear earplugs and blinders when you drop her off. :-) Smooches

p.s. Now that I think about it, she wasn't instantly enamoured with me during my most recent visit(as most children are), so maybe you should have her checked out by a doctor. LOL!!

[Tamara B.]

My children were always sick all of the time when they first stated going to daycare and I was paying for nothing.

[Michelle]

Ugh, that is not fun. I will say that I had good experiences making sure that every time someone left, it was noted. It was noted that they were leaving, if they'd be back, and there was a quick cheerful wave -- same cheerful wave when they came back. Rather than trying to distract her and have her be more upset when she's been "tricked" would that be something you could try? Good luck!

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[ゾフラン]

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