The Malibu Mishap. I Deserve a Do-Over

Monday was crap. So today, all day, I'm going to pretend it's Monday. I deserve a do-over.

 

Monday started well enough. I got up early before the scorching heat, put Muchkin in a stroller and parked her in the backyard. I then commenced to trimming and chopping the fruit trees, rose bushes, and plants unknown, that haven't seen me and my shears since I was big and pregnant. My husband claims he was purposefully going for a jungle look in our backyard. He should be SO proud that his excuse goal was achieved. However, with each massive heap of branches, weeds and overgrowth I created, I was achieving my goal of creating an acceptable yard prior to Munchkin's birthday party next month.

 

After a couple of hours, Munchkin was no longer distracted by pool water, flying birds, and barking neighborhood dogs, so that put an end to my temporary career as a landscaper. And we moved on to our family plan for Monday. This is where it went all downhill. 

 

If you're simply curious, or if you thrive on other folks' misfortune because it helps you feel better, please continue reading - put yourself in a great mood at my expense. It's the least I can do. If you are easily annoyed at other people whining and complaining, feel free to skip to the end. Or just come back to the blog later this week. I have another great product review coming up, and it will surely be free of negativity.

 

Let the drama unfold...

 

Where: Malibu. A visit to the lagoon, a tour of some historic house and gardens, and a quick trip to the beach. You may recall that last time I was there, I was hanging out with Brooke Shields.  This time, I was with my very nonfamous family. 

 

Why:  Because my kid missed last year's school fieldtrip to the same location. This was mommy's effort at making it up to her. Wasn't her fault that her school ridiculously scheduled two fieldtrips, back to back, in the same week, so that any kid that was ill ended up missing both of them.

 

What:  We get to Malibu easily enough, which was pretty lucky, since my husband was responsible for the navigation and likes to keep all the directions and information in his head instead of on paper. We pay $10 for the overpriced parking lot and attempt to make our way to the historic house and gardens. Munchkin is in the stroller, because I had removed the back carrier from the car trunk just that morning. Brilliant. Well, the first route we take doesn't lead us anywhere near the house we are trying to reach, but instead the trail ends at the sandy beach. Ever tried to push a stroller through deep sand? Ain't going to happen. And all I can think is, what damage is the sand grain doing to the wheels of this $900 stroller that was a gift and that we surely can't replace? So, we turn around and take the second trail we had seen, and we end up...at the end of the first trail. We had just walked in a complete freakin' circle, back at the beach where we can't push the stroller. We ask a lifeguard for help, and he tells us the house we're looking for is way up the beach, and we'd be better off driving there. Remember that parking lot fee we already paid? Basically, we spent $10 to walk in a circle.

 

So, we all get back in the car, drive up further, and wait for some spot to open up on a busy, packed street. Finally, we see someone leaving and wait, and wait some more, because the driver has to take about 10 minutes to brush the sand off his feet, put on his shoes, talk to his girlfriend, and basically annoy me to the point that I want to lay my hand on the horn and never take it off. I will never understand how some people can move so slowly even when they know someone is waiting for the spot. There should be a law. Finally, he pulls out...and we pull in. NOT! Dork-face was parked at a fire hydrant. What...are...the...chances...of...that?!

 

I hear you laughing. I don't blame you. If it hadn't happened to me, I'd be laughing too.

 

OK, I'm getting traumatized all over again, so I'm going to try to make this quick. We finally reach this historic house. I ask my daughter to stand next to the sign for a photo. Pull out the camera...nothing. I responsibly removed the camera battery and charged it the night before. I irresponsibly forgot to put the battery back in. There will be no photographic memories of this spectacular day.

 

On to the stupid tour of the stupid house. We soon discover that the website hasn't been updated in God knows how long, because they no longer offer the tours on Mondays. Whatever. You seen one magnificent house on 13+ acres of lush, beachfront land, you've seen them all. We take our own darn self-guided tour...twice...because my daughter thinks she's Nancy Drew or something, and is pretending to be in some Malibu mystery.

 

I'm tired, I'm hot, and I'm bothered. But, I agree to go down to the beach so my kid can at the very least put her feet in the nasty ocean water. I'm counting the minutes of her playing the "waves can't catch me game."  When she's done untangling seaweed from her ankles, we have to walk uphill in the sand to get to the car. My husband falls while holding the baby. Now in addition to being tired, hot and bothered, I'm embarrassed.

 

On the drive home, he suggests that we stop by my absolute favorite bakery. A red velvet cupcake, and ONLY a red velvet cupcake from this bakery, will salvage the otherwise pathetic day. Woo-hoo! A light at the end of the tunnel, and all those other cliches that are applicable when you're relieved and excited. We arrive at the bakery...

 

And I am greeted with locked doors and a little handwritten sign that reads,"We will close early on Monday, August 10th, for annual training. Thank you for your understanding." You don't have my understanding. My understanding is the last thing you have. I understand nothing right now, including what I did to make the universe screw with me so much today.

 

I leave you with a question: how much frustration do we have to put up with, before we're entitled as parents to not be positive and optimistic in front of our children? At what point, and for how long, can we be bitter and frustrated, and maybe even (gasp) curse under our breath?  Is it OK to let them see us lose it? Annoyance is a normal, human emotion. It's not always realistic to see "the bright side of things." Not all parents agree, but I truly believe that it's OK for our kids to see us cry, if only to witness that we can also recover.

 

Well, apparently, in my world, there's a time limit on my frustration and what I allow my kids to witness (reserved mostly for when I'm driving in LA traffic). We pulled up to our driveway at the end of the day, and my daughter cheerfully asked, "what was your favorite part of the Malibu trip?!" I said to myself, "coming back home." OK, honestly, I didn't say it to myself, I said it out loud, but only so my husband could hear. I think. With my last bit of strength and resolve, I said equally cheerfully, "spending time with you." And that would actually be the truth.

 

I'm off to enjoy my new Monday. Even though the baby and I are both sick as of yesterday. Oh yea, it just keeps getting better, darlin'.

 

 

 

Comments

[Kristy M.]

I'm sorry you had a bad trip. I can definitely say I have many days like this lately. It can only get better right? Or at least I hope.

[Stacy]

Awww man! I'm sorry to hear about your "comedy of errors" mama, but it did make me smile. Uh, I know it's too late now, but for future reference (because I have also responsibly charged my camera battery the night before an event then irresponsibly forgotten to put it back in the camera) remember that you probably ALWAYS have a camera with you. Your phone. I know, I know. It's not the same. But, if you happen to be out and about and you don't have your camera and the little one decides to stand up and walk for the first time...grab that phone and capture the moment with pictures!! In fact, you can probably video it with your phone! Uh...this may require you to read the directions on your phone, so go do that! K? :-)

Smooches

Smooches

[Shannon]

In my experience the well planned days of fun are inevitably disastrous. The most fun I have with my kids happen by surprise...while we're out running errands or cleaning up around the house.

Good luck with your new Monday mama.

[Erin]

I'm sorry you had such a rough day...and then you couldn't get into Susie Cakes? I only know that that is where you went because I had to pick up cupcakes for Kennedy's cheer team party on Saturday and saw the sign! If I knew it was going to be such a bad day for you, I would have bought some extra and delivered it to you yesterday! I'm hoping that today will be better, and that you are your normal happy self! Miss you!
Erin =)

[Louise]

Wow what a day. You certainly enjoy to have perfect days for the rest of the week !

[April]

"Momma said there'd be days like this..."
And there are definitely worse things you can say to your kid than you like coming home!
Hope your new Monday is going much better!

[Kim]

I too can relate to those days. Somehow everything always works out perfectly in our planning but the actual execution never really turns out the way we expect. The good news is that it sounds like your daughter had a good time hanging out with the family and going on an adventure. Hang on to that and have a great Monday do-over.

[Merrymack]

Wow!That is a day girl! I have had them and I agree with you. At point do you get to scream out your frustration for the day? Does the break down always have to be in private? Here's to a better week.

[Michelle]

Ohh that sounds like a fun day. Yikes, sorry about that! I can see some of the humor in it, but only because I'm so far removed. Here's hoping you got that cupcake today!

[Pam R.]

Glad to hear I'm not the only one with days like that! If you managed to hold it together and not have your kids see you cry, you are my hero and a saint. My kids have seen me lose it. I don't curse and do my very best to not bad-mouth anyone in my despair, but I've cried. It usually results in my 3 yr. old saying, "Do you have a boo-boo Mommy? Are you okay?" to which I respond, "It's okay, bud. Mommy's just frustrated and sad" and then he'll do something silly or say something so profound for a 3 yr. old that I'll inevitably giggle which cheers me up somewhat!

[hmmmm1977]

Lol you get no do-overs. As for your experience: Remember it, savor it and next time make sure to call ahead to see if they are open.
There has been very stressful/annoying/crazy days that have made me lose it in front of my kids. They know I get upset, I have emotions too! I have stifled myself to a point though. Long gone are the kidless days where I would have had an fullblown cussing, screaming and bawling meltdown, I don't think it is possible for me to let my kids see me in that light anymore. Or maybe I am just not that person anymore???